Thursday, November 1, 2012

PC's Famous Cure for the Common Cold (and Flu)!

Before I let you into my big secret, my really big secret, perhaps we should first discuss the issue.
So, they can put a man on the moon; they’ve managed to successfully transplant hearts, lungs, kidneys, eyes… well everything really as proven with Billy Bob. On top of which they’ve even managed to not only clone a sheep but also give her a name, Dolly, as well. You’d have to imagine that they cloned quite a few smaller animals along the way on their development process, would you? But humans? I wouldn’t have thought so but on second thoughts it’s always dangerous looking too closely into the mirror.
Anyway, as I was saying, they have achieved all of the above and yet they still haven’t managed to discover a cure for the common cold (or flu)!
I mean, come on… can you really believe such a thing?
No, of course we can’t.
Somewhere out there, there must be large warehouses stocked to the ceilings with boxes of MFC (magic flu cures) and lots of other great ideas/inventions and they’re all going to stay out of our reach, just so we can all serve the name of commerce.
But let’s get back to our flu and cold cure. Just visit any of your local chemists and check the shelves positively laden down with their stash of their winter cold and flu remedies and you’ll realise exactly the commerce at stake which is ultimately depending on no successful cures being discovered.
Personally whenever I visit a chemist and try to discover the name of their best remedy I’m usually advised by a shop assistant - how on earth do they manage to avoid the flu so successfully, particularly after a non-stop stream of flu victims? - that the treatments are all pretty much as good as each other. “Perhaps you should try our own in-house brand?” seems to becoming the popular retort. I discovered 127 OTC (Over The Counter) brands of medication claiming to help tackle all our winter ailments. I imagine when we do get down to it they’re all pretty much created from the same basic ingredients; namely: Paracetamol, caffeine and Phenylephrine, with the caffeine dropped from the “Night” comforters.
It used to be when a new brand hit the market they would be launched and promoted as being capable of working wonders and they’d immediately become the brand everyone was desperate for. For some reason or other all new bands seem to enjoy a certain degree of immediate success. I suppose that could be due to SWT (sugared water theory) where once you feel your ailment is being treated you automatically start to feel better.  With Contact 400 for instance I could actually feel myself feeling better as the numerous (well at least 400 we have to assume) little particles of wonderments worked their way into my ailing system and reciprocated their magic as delayed-action time-bombs continued to be effective long after the time of the initial administration. That was of course until the time arrived for the next dose. You’d have to think thought that if any of the cures were totally 100% effective then sales would suffer. They just needed to be effective enough to give you some respite but, at the same time, not being so effective that you didn’t long for more comfort.
Since then every autumn had given birth to the latest in an ever growing line of miracle cures.
One alternate route to the above 127 OTCs is the evergreen herbal choice. There are clearly a growing number of NDTYSs (no damage to your system) remedies. Let’s see there Enchinacea (a root extract); aconite which works on the principle that if you can drop a couple of these white micro tablets just as the cold or flu starts to raise its ugly head in its gestation period then the resultant increase in body temperature and energy might just beat the little germs into submission. However this seems to me to be similar to saying that if you have a good goal-keeper then you’ll be able to beat Manchester United, which, as we know, just isn’t true. Then there are the expensive Wellness tablets which are billed as: a Herbal Defense Complex. It’s recommended that you take these particular capsules of goodness when you’re feeling good the theory being they’ll build up your defence. Some swear by the Wellness approach, it’s just I’m not exactly sure which swear words they use.    
If you’re like me you’ll start off with the herbal route and when that doesn’t help and desperation clicks in you’ll switch to one (if not several) of the 127 OTCs when you’re happy to pump every legal chemical at your disposal into your system to try and rid your body of the dreaded winter nuisance.      
Some people are still actually even committed to the power of positive thinking.
One old fashioned approach I’m aware of is a hot whiskey mixed with sugar and several cloves. It is recommended you stir the solution furiously and drink it at as hot a temperature as you can bear to. Apparently this approach helps sweat the germs out of you. It has also been discovered that a few of the above drinks will temporarily numb you from your flu, however when you wake up you just might discover you’ve not one, but two ailments to deal with
People already infected with flu do unwittingly help spread the germs via door-handles, sinks, door-bells and knockers, shower and bath taps, railings, bannisters and other common hand-assistants. These germs spread a lot quicker and more effectively than we’ll realise. Just sneeze into an open newspaper and see first-hand from the pebble-dashed pattern just how effective their harvest of germs are; even if you have the manners to raise your hand to your mouth the little buggers still manager to get everywhere.
So what should/can we do to avoid and heal the feared flu and cold?
Well we should wash our hands a lot. We should be cautious about what we touch in public places; mainly toilets, stairwells, lifts, escalators, restaurant tables and chairs, trains and train stations, aeroplanes and airports etc etc., Other forms of protections? I do wonder how far away we are from wearing the face masks, currently popular about the streets and public transportation systems in Tokyo.
“Yes, yes, yes,” you groan, “but what exactly is your cure PC?”
How do you get rid of a cold so common no-one has bothered finding a cure for?
Okay, I’ll tell you.
My magic cure is TIME!
The best cure for the common cold and flu is TIME. The secret to the revolutionary cure is to take the time you need; to allow your body the time it takes to naturally fight off the flue or cold and make your body better again.
And you know what? If you don’t subject your body to various OTCs and cures and leave it to its own devices then my theory is your body, the wonderful creation that is the human body, will fight off all those wee flu bugs all the more quickly.
Of course you can help your body during this process by resting; eating good food; drinking a lot of water and inhaling from a bowl steaming hot water, with a few drops of eucalyptus, while under a towel.
Of course if none of the above works within the statutory three days we recommend you visit your GP asap.
This time while suffering from flu and undergoing my TIME cure...
I read:
Neil Young   I feel he’s saving a lot for Volume Two.
Pete Townsend - Who I Am.  A classic book against which all future 1960s pop autobiographies will be judged. A major achievement.   

And saw:

Manchester United at Chelsea (3 – 2) - the Red and Yellow cards tell the story.
The Imposter – a classic!
Barbara - excellent!
Ruby Sparks – loved it, strongly recommended.
Skyfall – all the chasing along the roof tops seems (to me) to be set in the same location as Taken 2.
Taken 2 – (see above) Liam outbonds Bond!
Liberal Arts - enjoyable in a good way.
The Good Wife 3rd Series - by far the best series yet.
Boardwalk 2nd Series – loving it.
Rookie Blue 2nd Series
Hatfield & McCoys (mini-series) knowing the end didn’t ruin the journey.
Blue Blood 2nd series... it's getting better all the time…

… talking of which…


Top Ten Best Covers of Beatle Songs:


01. Golden Slumbers     Jackson Browne & Jennifer Warnes

02. Blackbird                 Crosby, Stills & Nash

03. With A Little Help From My Friends  - Joe Cocker

04. While My Guitar Gently Weeps – Eric Clapton (Concert for George)

05. Ticket to Ride           The Carpenters

06. Day Tripper              Otis Redding

07. Here Comes The Sun – Richie Havens

08. Eleanor Rigby          Ray Charles

09. Something               Frank Sinatra

10. Got To Get You Into My Life – Cliff Bennett & The Rebel Rousers                     

I really wanted to include the song Isn’t it a Pity, a life affirming version by Billy Preston from the truly spiritually uplifting Concert for George DVD but then I remembered that although it was written by George during the Beatle years it didn’t see the (recorded) light of day until his majestic All Things Must Pass album, but both the song and the entire concert footage are well worth checking out. In my humble opinion it is by far the best live concert footage DVD ever released.

So until the next time,